Unconditional Acceptance

Even as I type the title idea it feels right to me because I’m Canadian, this idea that I need to unconditionally accept people. It feels right. 
But it’s wrong. In fact it couldn’t be more wrong and the scary part is that it feels so right, how can it be wrong?? I’ve already digressed into song lyrics that may or may not show that we tend to believe whatever we repeat (also scary). 
Enter the actual noble way of life and what should be the main star of the play: Unconditional Love. 
Unconditional Love says this: “No matter what you do I will love you”. Unconditional Acceptance says it’s opposite (Warning: it won’t FEEL opposite. Think of them like twins, one of which is always evil.) Kidding about the twins but in this scenario one is good and the other wicked. 
Unconditional Love: “No matter what you do I will love you”Unconditional Acceptance: “No matter what I do accept my behaviour”
Yikes ya’ll. 
Good luck, Beth Kope, raising a two year old Corey with that mentality! We’d have had the next Hitler running loose and nobody wants that do they?
I was raised with the opposite that parts of society are telling us now, and if we swallow this ridiculous opposite of truth we will fall into the historical rut of atrocities with any society whose individuals fall into the “Unconditional Acceptance Camp”. 
It is really a two year old’s mentality that wants all the same treatment, respect and rewards good kids get while acting like the devil. 
There are many I’m finding these days that look like adults but their mentality is stuck in what my mom and dad taught me was wrong long ago:
“Monsters don’t live here. We’ll love you no matter what, but if you want to eat and live indoors watch how you talk to your mother!”
That used to be normal. This was the thinking in society. But watch what happened…
People who grew up with a life-code less matured, less tried and true, less results oriented might not know enough to deeply distrust that maniacal personal drive that demands someone “accept every ridiculous thing I do”. 
This is where it starts: Living right is hard and everybody fails often who attempts it, but because pride is on the rise (and is much easier than humility) it became a simple trap in a society that values image and decorum more than truth (sorry, but someone had to say it) that when I make a mistake it’s easier to brazen it out and say nothing because I secretly know people are too polite to call me on it. Facing failure immediately is pride’s kryptonite. 
The next hurdle our mistake needs to overcome after I accept is as acceptable, so to speak, is that YOU need to accept it so I don’t have to do the work change and betterment requires. 
So Accept me no matter what I do and we’ll be friends. Then we can cover for each other because your system of values also allows poor behaviour in me right up until the moment it affects you negatively, then blow a gasket. 
Unconditional Love is amazing and extremely hard. It is high risk and high reward. It leaves you very certainly in a place where you will be hurt and pay the price that love requires. 
Unconditional Acceptance is quite the opposite. It DEMANDS everybody else pay a price the individual was supposed to shoulder themselves. It is deciding FOR people what they accept or don’t accept. If they call you out and you play your drama card right you win, until you lose it all…
If you fall into the Unconditional Acceptance Camp that moves the target wherever your arrows are flying, you’ll start hating yourself for it. And once you start hating yourself for it you’ll start hating other people for not calling you out. 
Guilt is a funny thing where you’re absolutely, 100% supposed to feel terrible when you do something wrong. Unconditional Accepters don’t have the courage to feel terrible when they do terrible things, so they make you feel terrible when you finally can’t take it anymore and hide behind the “You’re saying hurtful things!” Because no one is allowed to feel hurt except them. 
The truth is maybe what hurts?
But the beauty about guilt is that when you deal with the actual issue by apologizing, creating a 180 degree plan for changing your behaviour, and committing to owning future faults, guilt goes away (the only time it doesn’t is when shame is involved but that’s another convo for another day). 
The truth shall set you free, and the truth is you acted like an idiot and should stop. 
Here’s what happens in the Unconditional Acceptance Camp: You strike a deal with yourself to personally accept your own bad behaviour. The scary thing that happens next is that your good parts and bad parts start blending together as YOU. 
The next step is an awful one is that you accept both you light and dark as WHO YOU ARE, and demand everyone else does too. 
Ever done that? “This is just WHO I AM, and you need to love WHO I AM.” What we really mean is “Accept the good AND bad inside of me because that’s what I think love is!!! If you don’t you’re a hate-filled monster!!!”
But should I really love the parts of me I should hate, like when I cheat to win an argument? I think a better version of me separates the good parts from the bad, loves one and hates the other. 
In fact, when I apologize I’m admitting I let the monster out for a moment, but “That’s not who I really am. I’m better than that.
That’s when the magic starts and I begin acting out of the good parts and disowning the bad. 
There’s always hate in the hearts of those camping in Unconditional Acceptance. There are other things in there too called intolerance, racism, immortally, unfaithfulness and any other thing that requires a story you shouldn’t believe about why you are the way you are. 
There are two parts of Corey, the good parts that God created and sustains, and the parts the devil wants to use to hurt me. 
If I make the critical error of asking someone to accept my sin because I have, I’m asking them to accept the devil, and eventually LOVE HIM (if you watch the news you believe in the devil), and to be clear… THAT’S NOT GOOD. One should hate the devil. 
It’s hard to love people unconditionally when you make that deal… 

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