Two Times the Fun

If one is fun, two is better.

This is how I live my life. If I have a cold and need Vitamin C, I go straight to attempting to eat ten of them. I don’t actually eat ten of them because Erin stops me.

Some people have a gift of walking in right at the moment I’m getting ready to pull the trigger on something genius and/or stupid. My buddy in school could watch fifteen kids throw erasers across the room, but the moment his eraser leapt from his hand the principal’s head would pop through the door.

“Steven!! My office. NOW!”

It was uncanny. It was as if he was the main item on the agenda at staff meetings (likely true).

My wife is my school principal because every moment of brilliance and/or what-were-you-thinking?? she arrives like Spiderman, just in time!

“Hey, you can’t eat ten Vitamin C’s!”

Me: “Um yes I can. They’re delicious and you’re not the Vitamin police.” (I know because I checked after I said that. There’s no such police.)

Erin: “It’s not going to help more than eating two will.”

Me: “Um. Yes it will. It’s five times more. I’ll get better five times faster!”

Imagine a conversations between Tigger and Eeyore? It’s something like that. One side makes no sense and the other side makes no fun.

I recently started lifting weights in my basement and “Erin the Realist” told me I should be careful with my shoulder, having torn my rotator cuff auditioning for the movie 300 back in the day because my body looked right for the movie (Nothing of the last sentence is true. I took a bad dive in a game of volleyball:).

“Erin…” with my patented patient look “I’m working out so I don’t HAVE to be careful with my shoulder. That’s what working out is for!”

So in unrelated news my shoulder has been bothering me because I pushed it a little too hard and I decided I needed to take glucosamine sulphate for it, mostly because we have it in the cupboard already and it’s in pill form. Anything in pill form is likely good for shoulders, so I started dumping a bunch into my hand to kick things off right.

Who was looking over my shoulder? You know who.

Eeyore: “What are you doing?”

Me (remembering the whole shoulder conversation she may have been right about): “Um. I guess my shoulder’s been bothering me.”

Erin closing her eyes slowly then opening them again, obviously impressed with the manliness of her man: “Did you work out too much?”

Me: “Obviously.” (Really, Erin, why do you make me state the obvious? It degrades us both.)

She grabbed the bottle and started reading the label, which is a sticker telling you actual information about the product and dosages and other boring things like if taking too many could kill you.

“It says take two a day.”

Me: “I don’t have that kind of time to fix my shoulder. I need to work out tomorrow again!”

She slowly closed her eyes and sighed, probably trying to suppress her physical attraction to me in the moment, I would be very hard to live with that way…

But that’s how we are together, and it mostly works. Erin worries about following rules so we don’t die, and I worry about taking risks so we can really live.

Having said that, two is two times the fun.

Since Venue Church’s move from the theatre to Magic Mountain in King’s Heights we’ve needed to organize adding another service on Sunday mornings. If one service was fun, two will undoubtedly be twice the fun! One at 9:30am and one at 11am starting Dec 29 should do the trick.

I’m just glad that I have people around me like Erin who actually organize the thing so we don’t go around tearing rotator cuffs and what have you.

If two services are twice the fun, they’re also four times the work.

‘Bout like real life…

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