I think I’ve fallen into the trap of thinking that quiet people are humble and loud people are proud.
We’re in a series at Venue called Bad Timing (aka the things we struggle with that throw our timing off) and the discussion at small group last night was about pride. We asked “What traits do you like best about humble people?”
It was a great discussion because I’m still thinking about it this morning and I’ve come to a realization that wasn’t quite evident last night.
If you’re a creative type you tend to look for deeper meaning below the surface. Every sermon I prepare there are the obvious things to speak about that affect normal (and not normal) people, but what really makes me sweat is trying to find the “thing underneath the thing”.
Your life is made up of decisions that seem mostly simple to you in the moment. But every little decision you make comes from a much deeper assumption that can be quite sub conscious.
Maybe someone left you when you were a child and that’s why you do your best to keep the peace?
Maybe someone hurt you in the past and you secretly hold back with people today?
Your thoughts of humanity and life and how you feel deeply affects your decision making.
Your thoughts about the existence of God and his role in your life absolutely do.
Who and what you’re living for informs your current decision to put your child in what activities.
So back to the drawing board, what was really trying to appear to me as we spoke to the traits of humble people we admire?
I realized that sub consciously I’d decided that because some loud people are proud (it even rhymes and that’s catchy), quiet people must therefore be more humble?
It sounds a little illogical once I write it out, but who said everything we secretly believe is logical? Sometimes it’s just what we believe.
But in looking back to recent events in my life I’d have to honestly say that there are probably more quiet/ proud Canadians that ones who are loud.
It’s like when I was a kid. My life was just loud. My poor parents… sometimes I wonder how they did it.
I’ve always lived life on the edge and you rarely have to guess what I’m thinking because I’ll tell you! If I’m outspoken now, you should have seen me when I was two!
Looking back I’d have to say that the squeaky wheel got the grease alright, and I had more lectures and “behaviour curbing activities” than my brother did by many multiples. Also looking back I’m grateful my parents figured me out and were humble enough to love me that much, but my goodness I took a lot of parenting!
I have had decades of experience with people now and I’ve noticed that a loud and proud person is easy to spot and deal with compared to a quiet/ proud. A loud person demands it but also has the benefit of the inevitable conflict that follows. Conflict is not terrible if a greater purpose and maturity is arrived at, in fact a wise person would say there is no great purpose without it?
But a quiet/ proud can go under the radar can’t they?
Oh you quiet people can be stuuuuuuuborn! Nobody really knows until you hit your limit and you finally blow and tell everybody what you’ve really been thinking all this time!!
Ya’ll quiet/ stubborns have had this private little self talk going all these years and no one even knew to interrupt you. Private decisions and private emotions and private judgemental stories where you’re both the author, reader and martyr!
In other news I know some quiet people who are extremely humble too. But I decided this morning that I needed to be around BOTH loud/ humble and quiet/ humble because I just need to be around HUMBLE.
The quiet humble person spends their life thinking about others and letting someone else write their story for them.
But sometimes you need a loud/ humble to tell youthe truth about you because the quiet/ humble waits to give advice until you stop talking and ask for it,
which is a bit of a problem if you’re me and need interruptin…